Author Topic: Developing Coaches  (Read 75732 times)

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Offline MHcoach

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #330 on: November 26, 2016, 03:28:58 PM »
I'd just move Vince back to the kids' table and let the adults continue the original discussion.


Why?

I have learned more from having flame wars than anything. When Jake first came to the board him & I would go at it like 2 pit bulls fighting over a steak. He pretty much out right called me an asshole & I he. After a few PM's we both realized we were both saying the same things. Today he is one of the guys I respect here.

If someone disagree's with what I think that is often an opportunity to learn. I can't account for offending anyone, that is just me.

Joe
"Champions behave like champions before they're champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners"
Bill Walsh

Offline MHcoach

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #331 on: November 26, 2016, 03:31:01 PM »
Michael

Be careful you may get told you are running off lurkers & are evil.

Joe
"Champions behave like champions before they're champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners"
Bill Walsh

Offline Michael

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #332 on: November 26, 2016, 03:34:03 PM »
Do what you want, of course, but it's going to be 40 more pages of Vince explaining why he's not horseshit and everyone else explaining how that's not what they meant. OK, I think he's horseshit, so there's that. It's not like anyone picked on him. He felt threatened because of whatever is going on psychologically for him. I don't know what it is, and I damn sure don't care, other than that it's killing what could be a good thread.
If you can't explain it to a six-year-old, you don't understand it yourself. ― Albert Einstein

Offline MHcoach

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #333 on: November 26, 2016, 03:37:27 PM »
After Mahonz post this morning I spent the time to reread the entire thread. I think there is some very good things here. I think it needs to stay.

Joe
"Champions behave like champions before they're champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners"
Bill Walsh

Offline Vince148

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #334 on: November 26, 2016, 03:39:51 PM »
Do what you want, of course, but it's going to be 40 more pages of Vince explaining why he's not horseshit and everyone else explaining how that's not what they meant. OK, I think he's horseshit, so there's that. It's not like anyone picked on him. He felt threatened because of whatever is going on psychologically for him. I don't know what it is, and I damn sure don't care, other than that it's killing what could be a good thread.
Michael, there was a time that I respected you. But if it makes you feel better about yourself calling me a whiny bitch or horseshit, then go for it. It just proves my point in my previous post and shows the kind of person you really are which is why I stopped respecting you a long time ago.
« Last Edit: November 26, 2016, 03:45:13 PM by Vince148 »

Offline Vince148

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #335 on: November 26, 2016, 03:52:26 PM »
Dave, Sometimes we erroneously relate our experiences with that of others thinking that if that's how it worked in our own case, it must be true in their situation as well. That's why it was a guess and it was wrong.

Offline CoachDP

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #336 on: November 26, 2016, 04:05:26 PM »
Dave, Sometimes we erroneously relate our experiences with that of others thinking that if that's how it worked in our own case, it must be true in their situation as well. That's why it was a guess and it was wrong.

Yeah, I get that.  But I wanted you to know that I started out modestly:  with no experience coaching, none playing and no designs on anything other than trying to make a youth org better.   Other opportunities presented themselves for whatever reasons, but not because I had designs on them.

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Offline Test Account

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #337 on: November 26, 2016, 04:18:57 PM »
Maybe that Millenial "safe space" thing is gaining ground even in the supposed meritocracy that is the game of football
That would be a shame

I've worked with literally thousands of youth coaches
Just like kids you reach them all in variety of ways
Sometimes the only way certain people will listen is if you raise your voice

Candy coating for grown men?
If I'm consuming definitely not for me
candy coating me is already here. On this site much less. I use to be nave to this idea that my age group was safe from this, it aint. We are in some case worse than those behind us.
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Offline MHcoach

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #338 on: November 26, 2016, 05:10:01 PM »
I learned early in my coaching career to have a thick skin. I can remember getting blasted for making a bad call during a game, even though the call worked out. Instead of being offended I asked the simple question why(after the game of course). I used that as a learning tool not a negative.

My first year as a HC we won a big game against our arch rivals. I see my mentor after the game, thinking he is going to congratulate me. Instead he chastises me for not punting in a certain situation, even though we made the first down. He explained the strategy, again I used it as a learning tool.

Coaches need to understand football isn't meant for the weak of heart or spirit. Ego & arrogance are also part of being a good coach. You need to have your players believe in you & their selves. We could be playing Alabama with a team of 12 y/o's & I want them to believe they will win. That doesn't mean I think you should exclude anyone, no matter what you think of their opinion. Somewhere in this thread I posted about Bear Bryant & how he would hire coaches who knew more than he did. He would start a discussion that often turned into a full argument. He would then sit back to listen to the 2 coaches argue so he could learn what they knew.

Since this about developing coaches what a better place to post than this. We as coaches learn by success, failure, listening to others, experience, self reflection, the ability to admit our mistakes, & lastly by having an open mind. My job is to coach my team, not be liked by them, or be their pal. Yet, I never want to lose sight that it is a game. My players usually start out hating the old man, until they realize I actually care about them. They understand there is difference from being on the field, & the rest of life. On the field I never accept less than their best, off the field I try to help them become a man. I have often received a phone call from "one of my boys" who thanked me for helping them become a man. That is the best payment any coach could ever get.

Joe
"Champions behave like champions before they're champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners"
Bill Walsh

Online mahonz

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #339 on: November 26, 2016, 05:25:59 PM »
Im just looking for a means to get more lurkers to participate.

Not sure there is any one specific answer but the inexperienced looking for help might be intimidated by some of the conversations....not to content but rather the attitude.  That is the info that has come back too me so I thought I'd kick it out to all of you for discussion. I think we'd all agree that more participation is a good thing. Sometimes the written word is taken out of context so there is that. The vast majority of us have had a relationship for a long period of time and have some fun at one another expense.

Again...I could have picked a number of Threads to post this in....just picked this one because it was active and a good example of what might be the problem.

Just kicking ideas around. I dont think this Thread has been negative at all but I can see where others might disagree. Although Im not sure why Vince is a target. He has been a contributor for many years and always respectful.

Collect moments, not wins.

Online davecisar

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #340 on: November 26, 2016, 05:28:15 PM »
candy coating me is already here. On this site much less. I use to be nave to this idea that my age group was safe from this, it aint. We are in some case worse than those behind us.

Telling someone what they are doing isnt going to be successful- helps them and helps other "lurkers" who may be making the same mistakes
If you dont want input on your ideas- or only positive feedback- then the dialog is worthless

How would it be kind and helpful to see someone driving 100 mph directly towards a cliff and not tell him to stop?
However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.

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Online mahonz

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #341 on: November 26, 2016, 05:30:54 PM »


M

I just read through all 20 pages & I am definitely wondering what you are talking about. In no way is this some terrifying thread to scare off coaches.  Instead it's about all coaches learning & working at getting better, including all who post.

Joe


Completely agree...and a Thread I have participated in. It just got a bit off kilter lately by piling on the assumed quality of youth coaches.

My guess would be every Coach that wins the Championship in Disney this year has never heard of Dumcoach before....so why assume? Or maybe I am assuming and all of them have lurked a time or two. Who knows.
Collect moments, not wins.

Online mahonz

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #342 on: November 26, 2016, 05:35:45 PM »
So maybe we preface each post with the level commitment that it ia intended for? No thanks. Maybe a thread or section just dedicated to the dad that just got thrown to the wolves and has 2 weeks to put it all together. Those threads would end up evolving into the craziness that we all suffer from. I think just about anyone who is so discouraged by the postings here should not be a coach anyway. I do think a section dedicated to those new comer dad coaches would be good. It would just have to be heavily moderated and who is going to do that? Much of what we discuss is for guys who coach multiple years even after their kids age out. A new coach at a Glazier might be wasting his time.

Great idea. You're hired  :)

When I first started posting on the Internet I used to think every league was like mine....most every situation was like mine....more like minds like mine.

Wow....I was a million miles off and it took me a while to figure that out.  I think that is what gets lost....situations are so vastly different everywhere we all tend to judge.
Collect moments, not wins.

Offline MHcoach

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #343 on: November 26, 2016, 05:44:47 PM »
M

Can we agree there are good youth coaches & bad youth coaches?

I believe you are confusing the difference. At least twice in this thread I have said some Youth coaches are better than those being paid. There are some who are however horrible. Developing coaches is an attempt to make guys better. I find it strange that men who are coaches or want to be coaches find it intimidating to post in anonymity.

When we talk about what makes a bad coach, self reflection maybe needed if you find it personal. The clinical definition of insanity is doing the same things & expecting a different result. I know personally that I try to take mistakes as well as successes as learning tools.

I think sometimes coaches will try to read between the lines when there is nothing but blank spaces there.

I did however take offense to indirectly being told I am arrogant & running off lurkers. Find another coach here who has been open to contact from anyone on this board.

Joe
"Champions behave like champions before they're champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners"
Bill Walsh

Online mahonz

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Re: Developing Coaches
« Reply #344 on: November 26, 2016, 05:46:03 PM »
Youth Football: Where coaches scream at kids all day, every day, that they need to be tough, but are scared to post anonymously on an internet message board.

The Gentlemen that I am referring to is a hard core christian man happily married  with 5 children that says grace when he takes me out to dinner and has never not once ever yelled at or grabbed cussed kicked or complained about anything to anyone ever.....not one time.

One of the most level headed coaches I know. Incredibly fair, extraordinary detailed, ridiculously humble and well loved by his team.

But posting here would be like being thrown to the lions.

His words. He might even be reading this Thread as we speak.  Yet you continue to disrespect things you know absolutely nothing about.

I remember a time...not too long ago...you were intimidated to post up too much information here. You have completely turned your back on your own roots my friend. Its disappointing.
Collect moments, not wins.