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Author Topic: Org splitting...what to do?  (Read 1484 times)

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Offline Bob Goodman

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #15 on: January 01, 2019, 06:24:20 PM »
I'd assumed, perhaps wrongly, that BTS wanted to coach in the same club his children played in.  If that's not a requirement, then sure, keep coaching with the old one, and let the kids go to the new one or stick w the old, as they prefer.

Offline CoachDP

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #16 on: January 01, 2019, 06:51:57 PM »
I'd assumed, perhaps wrongly, that BTS wanted to coach in the same club his children played in.  If that's not a requirement, then sure, keep coaching with the old one, and let the kids go to the new one or stick w the old, as they prefer.

I have no idea, Bob.  I'm not sure what the conflict was, or what the decision to be made was about.  Perhaps he wanted to coach with his present org and his kids want to follow their friends.  I can understand that conundrum.  But that's a decision for him as a dad to figure out.

--Dave
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Offline Bob Goodman

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #17 on: January 01, 2019, 08:37:58 PM »
I have no idea, Bob.  I'm not sure what the conflict was, or what the decision to be made was about.  Perhaps he wanted to coach with his present org and his kids want to follow their friends.
I didn't think you'd know.  Why would you?
Quote
I can understand that conundrum.  But that's a decision for him as a dad to figure out.
Uh...of course.

Am I missing something here that led Dave P to respond?

Offline BTS

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #18 on: January 01, 2019, 08:41:28 PM »
That's correct, I would prefer to stay because the people leaving are not really worth following but my kids will most likely want to go because their friends will be going.

Also, I know that they are volunteers and everyone has a right to leave and go elsewhere whenever they choose. However, I do think there is a professional way to handle such business. Do not come into the season asking to be on the board while you are already planning another organization and then lie at the end of the season to make everyone think you are returning. Do not bad mouth your current organization to get parents upset so they will be more willing to exit. Have a little professional courtesy and respect and I have no problem with the situation. Be upfront with the current board and let them know your intentions for next season. Thats why I think it is dirty...just not good business.

Online COACH JC

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #19 on: January 01, 2019, 08:51:57 PM »
No brainer to me. Do whatevers best for your kids. If that’s at the expense of the org you’re currently involved w/, so be it.
It's all about having fun.  But losing aint fun!

Offline CoachDP

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #20 on: January 01, 2019, 10:08:08 PM »
That's correct, I would prefer to stay because the people leaving are not really worth following but my kids will most likely want to go because their friends will be going.

--I'd sit down with "my" kids and discuss the situation with them.  Look at it from all sides.  Give them the benefit of your experience.  If you let your kids simply follow their friends, without giving them the benefit of your experience, then they miss out on a learning/teaching experience, which this surely is.

I do think there is a professional way to handle such business.

--And I'll agree with you, 100%.  However, expecting parents to behave in a "professional way" about this is unrealistic, IMO.  Nothing about youth football is "professional" anyway.  Nothing wrong with hoping for mature behavior.  Expecting it, on the other hand...

Be upfront with the current board and let them know your intentions for next season. Thats why I think it is dirty...just not good business.

Ok, gotcha.  Makes sense.  But do you actually know when they knew they'd made up their mind about their decisions regarding next season?  Regardless, even if they knew of their "next season plans," while in the formative part of "this season," people look out for themselves, even to the point of being selfish.  That's news to no one.  Have the discussion with your children.  I think that regardless of what you decide, it will turn out to be a win-win for you.

--Dave



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The Mission Statement:
"I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go." #BattleReady newhope

Offline ZACH

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #21 on: January 02, 2019, 07:53:10 AM »
Late to the convo, as a league and org admin for almost 12 years i have always been an advocate of the kid.  Meaning go where he wants to, where is friends are. If you do this you need not defend anything, your child is playing with his friends.

If the decision is made by an adult then theres more pressure for you to make the right call on whatever you base it on.

Freedom of choice, not consequence.
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Offline coachmiket

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #22 on: January 02, 2019, 09:53:13 AM »
I run my own basketball club.  People come and go.  We strive to give our families a positive experience and for our players to grow as both players and young adults.  Some people are looking for more than we offer and some people THINK they are looking for more than we offer.  Those people decide to leave.  That's ok.  We are true to ourselves and they are being true to what they want.  Whenever someone decides to leave us for something else I always wish them luck.  It's their child's future they are making decisions about and I'm not going to stand in the way of that.  We've had enough good things said about us and our on-court product is always fairly competitive and competent so I know we're going to be ok regardless.  We once had the mother of a pretty good player trying to sway another parent to bolt with her in the stands, during a tournament game. Stuff happens.

Secondly, don't discount allowing your kid to play with his friends and be happy.  Making the wrong decision here could lead to some long term resentment and you don't want that.  He's a kid, he deserves to have fun and he with friends.  Can he make new friends if he stays in this org?  Of course, but that's easier said than done in this type of situation.

Offline SingleWingGoombah

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #23 on: January 02, 2019, 10:03:10 AM »
If these people joined for that one year, just to create dissention, and poach people... that would be dirty pool.  If they came in honestly, didn't like what they saw, and thought they could do better, props to them for not just bitching behind backs, but actually doing something about it. 


Offline CHARLIEDONTSURF

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #24 on: January 02, 2019, 12:16:34 PM »
I do startups and turnarounds for a living so I’m biased. The status quo always resents change, and what the old regime sees as “secret recruiting” and “dirty business” is just a new regime trying to make things happen. Feelings get hurt, but the cold hard truth is -if an organization were healthy- it would easily withstand attempts to poach it or create dissension.

I come back to that point because you mentioned you also coach. And so the right decision for your kid(s) may be a bad decision for you. You sound resentful, and so I think it would be bad juju for you to coach in the new org. And even if you don't coach*, you risk being a resentful dad who stands in the white noise with other parents and takes passive-aggressive shots at the coaches and board members and always talks about how they played dirty pool and secretly recruited kids and....

Not saying this describes you.  I am saying resentment is a slow poison and it’s naive to not take yourself into account if jumping to NewOrg will make you sour. 16 weeks is a long time.  You don’t want to be that guy.

Good luck.

[*Edited for Bob] :)
« Last Edit: January 02, 2019, 07:00:47 PM by CHARLIEDONTSURF »

Offline Dusty Ol Fart

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #25 on: January 02, 2019, 12:39:57 PM »
Its akin to the old adage.  I'm taking my ball and going home. 

It happens all the time.  Folks have been trying to build a better mouse trap for years.  We have had a few folks go off on their own more than one came back after they discovered the grass wasnt greener.  For what it's worth, in my opinion, the needs and efforts of the ORG must outweigh the needs of a single Player, Coach, or Admin type.  Far better if 150 kids see benefit as opposed to 5 or 10 who seek to change something for their sake.  However, there will always be a Special Needs situation that could require accommodation. 

There will always be Monday Morning QB's, Agents, Lobbyists, etc trying to bend your ear. the rules, or criticize.  People who rely on Impulse to change are often dismayed by the outcome.  Everything has a Life Cycle. 

Weigh the Pros and Cons about Coaching.  Weigh the Pros and Cons about letting your Son follow them to the other Org.  In the grand scheme of things it is a learning experience for him to determine his path and make informed choices.  Even if he chooses wrong, what is the down side?  The upside is growth :)


 
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Online Dimson

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #26 on: January 02, 2019, 01:49:46 PM »
I would talk to your kid and be honest with them. If you don't want to leave, then tell them that. Then ask them why they want to leave and why they think it will be better? They might surprise you with their answer.

Offline Wing-n-It

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #27 on: January 02, 2019, 03:02:29 PM »
The org I coach with and most importantly my kids play in is splitting which brings about a tough decision. The people starting the new org were with us for one year and secretly recruited one of our coaches who will be able to get most of his team to follow. I do not think going is right because I feel what the did was dirty but most of my kids teammates they've played with the past couple of years will be going. What should we do?

You said most of the kids would be leaving

Have you talked to the parents. If you coach on the team you have access to the parents. Ask them. If by most you mean coaches and kids, then once you decide what youre doing let your parents know quickly, especially if youre staying. once they don't see the mass exodus that everyone is thinking you may be surprised at who will stick with the old org due to structure and people just don't like change.

Did they invite you as a coach to the new org? sometimes the reason is personal and they just want to hurt the old org cause they didn't get what they wanted.

They may be moving cause its not better for the kids but for them.

Dusty had a great post up above and I Echo his sentiments

Grass may look greener but you still have to mow it. They will need lots of help and MONEY to get this org. going.

Are they going to be in the same league as the old org.?

Are they going to be able to get games?

Parents will have worries about this as they should
Robert

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Offline Bob Goodman

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #28 on: January 02, 2019, 05:57:08 PM »
I come back to that point because you mentioned you also coach. And so the right decision for your kid(s) may be a bad decision for you.
But he never said he had to coach in the same club his kids play in.

Offline Majortom

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Re: Org splitting...what to do?
« Reply #29 on: January 02, 2019, 06:14:11 PM »
As Wing n it alluded to, you need to ask detailed questions and investigate the answers to make a sound decision.
Definitely check into if this new team has actually been or will be in the league with games and schedules in advance etc.
Costs....I assume they would get a 501c and then possibly get a loan this way unless they have some $$ they can invest initially.

What specifically are they planning to do differently?
I witnessed this happen several years ago and the group that left had a great plan, $$ and connections to school to pitch to parents/kids that did initially pull some and they are still doing well.  They went the whole Dave Cisar program route that got pretty well laughed at by some in the old organization but I knew better and couple times almost coached there just to be involved with that since they run it by the book (I like a plan!)
    I was just an assistant so not on the board or anything but original organization did not take them very seriously and still loses some kids to them every year. The new organization used every tool they could to win the parents/kids and initially did a nice job. Now they are starting to wain some now that the original organizers kids have graduated I assume the newer guys do not have the drive or motivation as before.
----It should all be about what the new org plan is for THIS coming year (not the future). If they can not get it correct out of the gate I see them as 1 and done.
Seen that happen around here several times.
Tom

   
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