When the parents start to turn

[KFMagee]

If you REALLY want to have a GREAT LAUGH... go visit the "Pee Wee Football Post Game Show" which  is just TOO FUNNY for words. It is a mock interview after each game with a poor coach that is clobbered each week by "overly concerned" parents who grill this coach.  Each week's episode highlites what we are talking about here, and as a coach you will ROLL ON THE FLOOR laughing!  Only about 90 seconds long for each spot.  They are also VERY professionally done!

Forward it to your parents under the guise of "hey parents - sure glad I'm not in this guy's shoes"... theywill enjoy it too, but also see what we potentially have to deal with.  Here is the link for the "Fighting Accountants".... do yourself a favor an watch all 10 episodes!        

=http://www.youtube.com/user/videopollen#p/u/15/6fCm5ukHyKM
#Invalid YouTube Link#

Coach Magee

[Knights]

I whole-heartedly agree with everything everyone has said.  Let me add a little bit of deflection that we all probably do, but no one has mentioned.

We sometimes tell parents something along the lines of "this is where we have started with kids.  We need to start with everyone somewhere, just to get everyone to learn a position.  Once we know that kids have some fundamentals down, and are able to learn another position, we will probably move some kids around to try different positions."  Left unsaid is we aren't going to do it until kids have their current positions down, and we aren't going to move someone to a position that they are totally unsuited for. 

I know it's not the answer the parents are quite looking for, but in some cases it has the dads pushing their kids to master their positions, so that they can try something else.

[davecisar]

  How do you guys handle the meddling parents who think their kids should be either playing more OR a different position? We did all the player evaluations etc...won our jamboree game 6-0(vs a division 1 team-we are division 2) and won our first game 25-0. Yet this week I have had no less then 3 parents approach the coaching staff and say "you guys are doing a great job BUT..."
1. 1 of our stud defensive players wants to be on offense
2. 1 of our WB's Dad wants his son to carry the ball more
3. 1 of our Bear Crawlers is getting bored and should have a better position
4. 1 of our BB's is a good blocker but fumbles and is hesitant when running---of course he wants to run the ball now
No we all know the blatant truth but you can't present it to the parents that way. The only 1 I can kind of understand is the WB player----but the team we played last week NEVER adjusted their front so we hit them right on almost every play---the 1 reverse we ran to the WB was for a minus 3 yards.  How do you gain control before it gets out of hand?

The VERY FIRST day mandatory parents meeting
We talk bluntly that we DO NOT CARE where they want sonny to play and we are not interested in their football opinions. You have to be part of the coaching staff to have any input
We put them in positions that are best for their ability and for our team
Our schemes and practice methodolgy is set and we arent compromising
We will NOT discuss positions, playing time or carries unless of course we do not meet our MMP standard
Setting expectations solves 99% of these issues
Always best to let them go and be a thorn in someone elses shoe

[MiamiHuskers]

1 problem we are facing this year involves 1 of our better kids. This kid is a true "popper" on defense and would make a great FB or BB on offense---except he is hyper--so he false starts, can't hesitate on a 31 trap, and always goes for the HR hit. Thus we put him on defense this year again(3rd year). His Dad WAS 1 of the coaches the past 2 years but this year was dropped from the team(too much Dad 1 on 1 coaching) and going against the other coaches. Anyway this kid is 1 of the top 4 -5 tacklers on the team. His problem is that no matter where we place him he isn't disciplined. DE he crashes, LB over pursues, CB bites to the inside and S bites up on every play. Now we coach him up constantly about his responsibility---but his Dad(who's now in the stands and is very loud) can be heard saying on every play "Johnny, get up their and hit somebody"--and 9 times out of 10 he does just that. But again yesterday he got caught twice running up to make a hit only to realize too late it was a pass----2 TD's. Ugh. We drill this kid every day in practice but then when he goes home with Daddy he gets drilled to do something else. We really don't know where to put this kid.

[CowboyCoach]

1 problem we are facing this year involves 1 of our better kids. This kid is a true "popper" on defense and would make a great FB or BB on offense---except he is hyper--so he false starts, can't hesitate on a 31 trap, and always goes for the HR hit. Thus we put him on defense this year again(3rd year). His Dad WAS 1 of the coaches the past 2 years but this year was dropped from the team(too much Dad 1 on 1 coaching) and going against the other coaches. Anyway this kid is 1 of the top 4 -5 tacklers on the team. His problem is that no matter where we place him he isn't disciplined. DE he crashes, LB over pursues, CB bites to the inside and S bites up on every play. Now we coach him up constantly about his responsibility---but his Dad(who's now in the stands and is very loud) can be heard saying on every play "Johnny, get up their and hit somebody"--and 9 times out of 10 he does just that. But again yesterday he got caught twice running up to make a hit only to realize too late it was a pass----2 TD's. Ugh. We drill this kid every day in practice but then when he goes home with Daddy he gets drilled to do something else. We really don't know where to put this kid.

Tell dad and the kid that the child has two choices 1) do what the coaches say or 2) do what dad says and sit on the bench.

[CoachMech]

1 problem we are facing this year involves 1 of our better kids. This kid is a true "popper" on defense and would make a great FB or BB on offense---except he is hyper--so he false starts, can't hesitate on a 31 trap, and always goes for the HR hit. Thus we put him on defense this year again(3rd year). His Dad WAS 1 of the coaches the past 2 years but this year was dropped from the team(too much Dad 1 on 1 coaching) and going against the other coaches. Anyway this kid is 1 of the top 4 -5 tacklers on the team. His problem is that no matter where we place him he isn't disciplined. DE he crashes, LB over pursues, CB bites to the inside and S bites up on every play. Now we coach him up constantly about his responsibility---but his Dad(who's now in the stands and is very loud) can be heard saying on every play "Johnny, get up their and hit somebody"--and 9 times out of 10 he does just that. But again yesterday he got caught twice running up to make a hit only to realize too late it was a pass----2 TD's. Ugh. We drill this kid every day in practice but then when he goes home with Daddy he gets drilled to do something else. We really don't know where to put this kid.

Coach, I have found that the best thing to do with that hyper kid if he continually disregards his responsibilities is to sit him more, if he is in at DE and crashes, he sits. If he is at CB and bites inside, he sits.  The time that you are using each practice to coach the hyper kid may be put to better use coaching up a replacement. Make it perfectly clear to him that if doesn't do what each position requires, he will be pulled from the game and replaced.

[davecisar]

1 problem we are facing this year involves 1 of our better kids. This kid is a true "popper" on defense and would make a great FB or BB on offense---except he is hyper--so he false starts, can't hesitate on a 31 trap, and always goes for the HR hit. Thus we put him on defense this year again(3rd year). His Dad WAS 1 of the coaches the past 2 years but this year was dropped from the team(too much Dad 1 on 1 coaching) and going against the other coaches. Anyway this kid is 1 of the top 4 -5 tacklers on the team. His problem is that no matter where we place him he isn't disciplined. DE he crashes, LB over pursues, CB bites to the inside and S bites up on every play. Now we coach him up constantly about his responsibility---but his Dad(who's now in the stands and is very loud) can be heard saying on every play "Johnny, get up their and hit somebody"--and 9 times out of 10 he does just that. But again yesterday he got caught twice running up to make a hit only to realize too late it was a pass----2 TD's. Ugh. We drill this kid every day in practice but then when he goes home with Daddy he gets drilled to do something else. We really don't know where to put this kid.

Put him at NT
or on the bench

[CoachDP]

I also address the MPR rule when a parent says "Couldn't you just switch my little Bobby with Tommy so Bobby can run the ball"?    I explain "Well, then Tommy will have to move to his next natual position, which is currently Johhny's spot, so then Johnny has to move to his next spot, which now belongs to Sammy"

That's the same explanation I provide.  I call it the "domino progression":  If I move Bobby to to Tommy's spot, then Tommy has to move to another spot, and so on.  Before you know it, I've moved the entire team to accomodate one player.

--Dave

[oldhatnewhat]

Put him at NT
or on the bench

I second that suggestion. There he has no choice of what to do and he could be huge there.

[CoachShad]

First let me say that I am my sons biggest advocate.  I am also his harshest critic.  When he complains about who is playing where I simply tell him you want the spot then go take it from him, knock him on his arse, beat him off the ball, when coach says I need someone to  do just hustle to him and say I got it coach.  He seems to think that being on the Scout Squad is a bad thing.  I disagree 100% you blow up my O or D on the scout squad I want to know why your not on the other side because someone on the starting side aint cutting the mustard!!!   

I tell all of the parents and kids that preseason practice is where you get to show me what you can do and how much you have in the firebox.  Coaches determine who plays where based on that performance and needs of the TEAM.  I have literally taken Dads on the practice field and shown them Little Billy isn't quite there yet, to no avail.  You can tell them and show them, it doesn't make a difference. In their mind Little Billy is the next coming of Payton, Butkus, or Unitas.

Sadly if they become a distraction or a source of drama for the team or other parents, its best to tell Billy's parents to keep him at home as they are not welcome any longer.

You want my whistle you can have it!  If you better prepared than I am and have the experience to lead the team to better place, I will indeed stand aside and cheer you on.  However, since you are standing here advocating something that I haven't seen from your son in X number of practices and Y number of games, I'm fairly certain the aforementioned isn't the case. 

[Belebuch]

That's the same explanation I provide.  I call it the "domino progression":  If I move Bobby to to Tommy's spot, then Tommy has to move to another spot, and so on.  Before you know it, I've moved the entire team to accomodate one player.

--Dave

I tell parents the same theory if they dont bring their kid to the game on time, or at all without giving me notice. Domino on gameday is not a fun game to play.

[joshv155]

Just got an email from a parent who heard another parent  (who has been an issue since day 1) talking during our last scrimmage about how he was going to come over to the sidelines and punch me in the face cause his kid wasn't playing enough. Went on about he didn't care about going to jail and he was going to do it eventually.....

I went to the league and have asked for his kid to be removed from my team....anyone think that is to harsh ? The kid is a good kid....just a MPP.....I don't feel like looking over my shoulder all practice and at games.....

[Belebuch]

You dont have time to worry about getting jumped on the sidelines because little Johnys dad feels his son isnt playing enough. Get him outta there. I cut a kid last year because his parents were the "I know my kid is small and fragile -Shouldnt be playing any contact sport-so as soon as he gets hurt we are going to sue" types. Here's your $$ back,Bye bye.

[CoachShad]

In common law, assault is the tort  of acting intentionally and voluntarily causing the reasonable apprehension of an immediate harmful or offensive contact. Because assault requires intent, it is considered an intentional tort, as opposed to a tort of negligence. Actual ability to carry out the apprehended contact is not necessary

As distinguished from battery, assault need not to involve actual contact—it only needs intent and the resulting apprehension.

Have the jerk arrested for it!! Sorry folks but these days you just never know about anyone.  If they say they're going to do it I believe them.   The league should not tolerate it one bit! 

[joshv155]

Coach Shad -

I agree with you 100%...in my non-football time I actually am the Po-lice......problem is in the state I am at there is no way we could arrest someone for just saying they would assault someone....I would love to...but it just wouldn't fly. They have to make an overt attempt or actually try to assault....otherwise he could just be, "venting".

But he won't be around anymore, but I wouldn't put it past him to show up and flip out...gonna have to bring some pepper spray to practice for awhile.