Am I crazy.

[justaparent]

I want my son to move to a competitive football league and team from his school affliated team.  Currently he is the best player on offense and defense.  However, the school team intentionally schedules teams they know they can beat.  The coaching staff is large, unorganized and doesn't focus on blocking or tackling.  For that matter they spend very little time on either.  Coaching delegation or position responsibility and practice planning are non-existant.  Practice is warmups, running offensive plays and sprints.  The kids play and practice either only offense or only defense for the whole year.  I'm not even covering the "daddy ball issues", lack of blocking rules, lack of attention to detail and 12 defensive plays and 20+ offensive plays.
      I have seen this other team practice and play, let's just say they are very good.  My son would not be the best player on this team, maybe top 3 to 8.  However, I think he would be a much better football player from the fundamentals focus and increased competition on the team and in the league.  He only knows a couple of kids on the other team.  He will be 10 next year.  He waffles on where he wants to play.  Some of it could be because he knows where I think he should play.
      Am I crazy?  Does it matter? 

PS This forum verifies that I'm not totally crazy.

[Coach D]

IMO (which is what you're asking for) it is really up to your son.  If he wants to be the best football player he can be, then you gotta put him on the team that is coaching more fundamentals and skills. I talk with my boy all the time about that to gauge his commitment and ask him if it is cool if I push him because I don't want to burn him out on a sport he doesn't love.   

On the other hand if he doesn't care and just wants to play football for fun with his friends, then let him have fun.  10 is still pretty young.  As he gets older he may realize he wants to excel farther I don't think it will kill him to take a year or two to decide that.  This is coming from a coach that thinks every kid should spend time in organized football, and would train fundamentals to a 4 year old if I could 

[ZACH]

I get new kids all the time from other teams, kids are naturally freindly he will make new freinds i wouldnt worry too much

But he needs to play to have fun , bc if he doesnt he wont play again

[CoachCalande]

Id lay off the criticism of the coaches and just let your kid play, learn and have fun. 

[CoachShad]

To be fair I spend an inordinate amount of time with my Offense simply because it more finesse than power.  It takes more to get all the pieces working together. 

To Steve's point, the are young and having fun keeps them interested.  There is only so much a 10 year old can do.  I am always amazed by those kids some would consider MPP's on our youth teams still plugging away in HS.  I have had more than a few who made all conference.  I would also caution parents that a stud at 10 doesnt always last as a stud. I am not saying your son isnt a good ball players but I have more than my share of kids who owned the field at younger ages get totally bummed by 7th and 8th grade because they were'nt dominating any longer.  That, pure and simple, is simply based on maturity.   They are still very good players but can't understand why they start getting caught for loss or hauled down after breaking the LOS.  The answer is that the other kids are starting to mature. 

I am a parent as well and I have heard all the reasons why my son gets angry after practices or games.  It it very hard for me to be an advocate for him and a coach as well.  He knows I will listen but I wont say anything to his coaches, thats his responsibility to handle and work out.  Whats my point? As others have said, ask him if he is having fun.  Ask him if he likes where he is? Let him decide what is best for him at this point.  If for no other reason the fact that he is 10.  Once he hits HS its a whole different world with more expectations.  Offer sending him to camps, check into sports training.

Bottom line is if he's having fun where he is at and improves then he must be learning something.  If he tells you that he's not having fun you have your opportunity.  I caution you that kids who go from "Stud" to middle of the pack struggle with their confidence as much, if not more, than kids who work hard just to maintain their spot in the pecking order.

That fact alone is something to consider very hard when making changes.  Yes I want to challenge them, but no I dont want to break them.  JMHO   

 

[CoachDP]

I was reading this post with some interest until I read:

"He will be 10 next year."

 

"Am I crazy?"

Sounds like it.

"Does it matter?" 

No.

--Dave

[spidermac]

Dave, I love how you get straight to the point 

[gumby_in_co]

As a dad and a coach, I would never again let my son play for a sub-par coaching staff.  That's just me.

[justaparent]

Thanks for all the input. 

[CoachDP]

As a dad and a coach, I would never again let my son play for a sub-par coaching staff.  That's just me.

Lar, I hear you.  And there's nothing wrong with wanting the best for your son.  I also agree with not letting your son play for a sub-par staff.

The OP's kid is nine-years-old and (of course) is "the best on the team."     I don't see where that matters, or why Proud Poppa needs to bring that into the equation.  ALL kids deserve the best coaching they can get.  If they can't get it with one team, then take them some place else.  Why is this a difficult decision?  Proud Poppa says his son "waffles" on where he wants to play.  If he wants to play with his friends (and the incompetant staff isn't putting the safety of their players at risk), then let him play with his friends. 

However, we all know that kids don't know what is best for them and yes, they do need to be challenged.  Some orgs just don't take things that seriously.  (I do, but that's just me.)  But if your son is going to participate in that kind of org, accept it for what it is and get the best out of it.  If he needs to face better competition, then take him elsewhere.  But save all that "my kid is the best on the team" for someplace else.

--Dave

[CoachCalande]

DP and others, I have heard comments very similar to those made by the OP and I can probably name the 5 kids who sat out, changed teams or quit...while we went on to great seasons withour "incompetence" - I guess we all just have to remember everyone else can do a better job even if they have never even tried.

I had a father tell me his 8th grade son could step in and "do a better job" than my varsity qb.

I have had a mother tell me that her son knew all of Peyton Mannings stats so should be a qb.

I have had a grandmother ask my why we dont look "just like the rams?"

it goes on and on. 

[coachgs]

I want my son to move to a competitive football league and team from his school affliated team. Currently he is the best player on offense and defense. However, the school team intentionally schedules teams they know they can beat.  The coaching staff is large, unorganized and doesn't focus on blocking or tackling.  For that matter they spend very little time on either.  Coaching delegation or position responsibility and practice planning are non-existant.  Practice is warmups, running offensive plays and sprints.  The kids play and practice either only offense or only defense for the whole year.  I'm not even covering the "daddy ball issues", lack of blocking rules, lack of attention to detail and 12 defensive plays and 20+ offensive plays.
      I have seen this other team practice and play, let's just say they are very good.  My son would not be the best player on this team, maybe top 3 to 8.  However, I think he would be a much better football player from the fundamentals focus and increased competition on the team and in the league.  He only knows a couple of kids on the other team.  He will be 10 next year.  He waffles on where he wants to play.  Some of it could be because he knows where I think he should play.
      Am I crazy?  Does it matter? 

PS This forum verifies that I'm not totally crazy.

Maybe he is waffling with the question of where to play because he is..... not ten yet. Or maybe he can not make up his mind because he has learned self confidence and decision making from you. And as this post demostrates you are not very good at it either. You have been your childs parent for almost ten years, have been in that team for at least one, but you expect total strangers to give you "GOOD ADVICE" based opun a 232 word account of the situation.

If you do not know what is best for your child, how the heck am I supposed to.

Fundamentals. If you feel so strongly about them, you can teach them yourself.

Unorganized, incompetent coaches. If you feel so strongly about them, you can volunteer, if you have volunteered and have a AC role, make sure you are organized and competent. It has been my experience that if you do this, others will get organized when they see the results and benefits. Others will do it out of pure embarassment. 

It seems to me that you are waffling because you are not sure if you rather have your son be "the best player on the team" or run the risk of becoming a bench warmer, 2nd -3rd stinger or back up player whatever you want to call it.

Decide what you believe is truly important for you as it pertains to your child. Then DO IT. DO IT. DO IT.

[CoachDP]

"Maybe he is waffling with the question of where to play because he is..... not ten yet."

--Well that's a good point!

Or maybe he can not make up his mind because he has learned self confidence and decision making from you. And as this post demostrates you are not very good at it either.

--Yikes.

"You have been your childs parent for almost ten years, have been in that team for at least one, but you expect total strangers to give you "GOOD ADVICE" based opun a 232 word account of the situation.

If you do not know what is best for your child, how the heck am I supposed to."

--Another good point.

"It seems to me that you are waffling because you are not sure if you rather have your son be "the best player on the team" or run the risk of becoming a bench warmer, 2nd -3rd stinger or back up player whatever you want to call it."

--Hadn't thought about it that way, but now that you brought it up, I'll agree with that statement, as well.

--Dave

[davecisar]

Just/parent

The quality of youth coaching varies greatly from team to team

That's why I ALWAYS suggest the year before a parent puts his child into football, that the parent goes to at least 1 practice and game of the teams they are considering. It's very easy to tell a well coached team from a poorly coached one. Dont waste a whole season when you can figure out the best fit with a little legwork.

I always check out the practices or competitions BEFORE I put my kids into anything- gymnastics, baseball, wrestling, Martial Arts, cheer, dance etc etc

Personally Ive wouldnt allow my kids to play in anything where the coaching is poor. From what little you describe- the coaching seems to be lacking. You dont want Jr to be one of those 70% who never go on to play football in HS. Move on.

Better competition- usually means better coaching and better development- JMO

[Daniel Lyons]

Just/parent

The quality of youth coaching varies greatly from team to team

That's why I ALWAYS suggest the year before a parent puts his child into football, that the parent goes to at least 1 practice and game of the teams they are considering. It's very easy to tell a well coached team from a poorly coached one. Dont waste a whole season when you can figure out the best fit with a little legwork.

I always check out the practices or competitions BEFORE I put my kids into anything- gymnastics, baseball, wrestling, Martial Arts, cheer, dance etc etc

Personally Ive wouldnt allow my kids to play in anything where the coaching is poor. From what little you describe- the coaching seems to be lacking. You dont want Jr to be one of those 70% who never go on to play football in HS. Move on.

Better competition- usually means better coaching and better development- JMO

Great advise if it is applicable.  Problem is for many football orgs. the coaches move up with their sons from year to year.  The coach you get is often a crap shoot.

I think we can all agree that we all want the best instruction possible /available for our kids in any arena.  I think some of the posts made good points, but they were a little unfairly hard on the original poster.   I have yet to see a father be completely objective about his son's ability.  It doesn't make them crazy or bad guys.  It's all a matter of degree and how far you take it.   This guy admits that on the new team his kid might be middle of the pack. 

If the one organization or the coaches they have do a better job of teaching and having fun than your school then the situation to me is a no brainer.   

If you would rather have the kid stay with his buddies then volunteer to help out or teach him proper fundamentals outside of practice. 

If it was me and my kid was a good or decent athlete than I would probably put him in the more competitive league.  I wouldn't really care or worry about what position he played though.